posted on October 12, 2009 at 10:50 am by Khali
Heliolithic [adj] (of a civilization) marked by the practice of sun worship and the erecting of megaliths. [Gk Helios, the sun + lithic, of a stage of man's development within the Stone Age]
(this being the erecting of large stones in patterns, i.e. stonehenge and the hurlers)
This is one of those words that one could appropriate for something in the realms of fantasy. What if those stone megaliths meant more than worhip? I like the theory that stonehenge is a calendar, built to track and mark the movement of the sun. But how did they get there? Were they placed by men, or by magic? Also, hardly anyone ever mentions the hurlers, or the other monuments all over Europe or similar stripe… hrm… the wheels, they are turning.
In your mind theres no time and a constant buzz…
posted on October 7, 2009 at 10:24 am by KhaliYou believe in what nobody else does
In your mind theres no time and a constant buzz
So disregard the master plan
It’s a disaster man you better ride it out
I can see it all in your eyes
Your future fades, your minutes are few
When the angels make contact with you
You believe in what nobody else does
And things ain’t the way they was
A fool like you is a freak to me
It’s unique to me, what you seek to see
I can see it all in your eyes
Your future fades, your minutes are few
When the angels make contact with you
I’ve seen the future isn’t pretty
Killer instinct, love a surprise
Make a stop, build a fire
Hold you breathe, cover your eyes
The tides are turning crimson
Nightfall growing like a cancer
Feeding on your broken body
Isolations not the answer
Listen what the wind says softly
Sound of traffic, smells like paper
Kisses on your worried eyelids
Sleepless nights turn into vapor
Like a dream and as the crow flies
Must reject the pain your trapped in
Give me all your hard earned beauty
Now I’ll tell you what will happen
Your day will fade and your thoughts will jade
And you’ll wake up in the middle of a dream
Coming up on hard luck, with a moment of silence
And no time to kill, no reason to care
Beware
I can see it all in your eyes
Your future for a dime, anytime
I can see is all in your eyes
Your future for a dime, anytime
I can see it all in your eyes
Your future for a dime, anytime
Your future fades, your minutes are few
When the angels make contact
[When Angels Make Contact - Matt Mays]
So what if she wakes late on weekends, at least she waits until after noon to pour her first drink. At least she cleans the litter box and and does the dishes from the night before before she settles into her chair with her drink and her book. This is all she wants, really. Time to do a little escapism into the realms of fantasy, time to be creative. It seems nowadays she needs more time that usual to unwind from the trial of the week: work. She used to like it, but when the addition of more responsibilities the joy has gone out of it and it’s become one giant demand of her resources. The status of her relationships have suffered recently and that has also stressed her out. By the time saturday rolls around she is exhausted.
She has to take time to think. It takes more time now but she thinks she can answer his question. He can’t get her out of his mind because enough time has passed for things to become idealised, and ideals are hard to live up to; hard to destroy. They never had enough time for things to pass from perfect into the mediocre that marks most relationships. All either of them have left is the passion and the tragedy. A sense of unfinished business. She ponders why this is; how it’s nearly impossible to lay the whole thing to rest. Maybe even how it might be best the way it is. Human frailty at its best. She sips and sighs. She knows that reality has moved them too far apart for anything to happen between them; they have both moved on. But there is a part - and she closes her eyes when she thinks this: there is a part of each of them that exists, perhaps in another reality, together. She cannot deny their affect on each other and she likes this thought, tucks it away to examine later. For now, she thinks it might be enough that they are a part of each others lives, whether they speak or not. They are part of each other because their time together helped forge who they are now. That kind of history makes thier current partners uncomfortable because they can’t live up to the tempestuous nature of what happened during said history. Not that either of them expect thier partners to even try. She respects the others enough to leave it alone, even though, like him, she feels a desire, now and then to reconnect. To re-examine, to maybe even make sense of all that happened… and so she writes. And writes….
your complications keep me sane
posted on October 3, 2009 at 4:54 pm by Khali
I’m back! Not that you’d really notice, since I hardly write daily anyway, but here I am nonetheless. Think I’m finally over the jetlag - it’s wierd being nine hours ahead of yourself. I had to go back to work the day after I landed and I’m surprised that I made it through the day at all. The cats were happy to see me and slept on my at the first opportunity - J too, really. =P
Anyway, the trip was awesome. We saw all the places that my mom wanted to see, and some of mine. We started in Edinburgh and made our way down the UK as far as London. Scotland is so pretty and we we lucked out with the weather in a major way. We did not have a day of rain. Granted there was a little when we were on the bus to Loch Lomond, but it was minor - espeically since that’s all they had most of the summer: rain. Ate haggis, tasted whiskey and saw the town where my mother’s maternal grandfather was born. We also saw the birthplace of her paternal grandfather and her father, which was also quite nice. Lovely houses. Took a mess of pictures, and I am still sorting through them. The last week we had in London and we did several museums and the zoo. Can you believe that up until then I had never been to a zoo? Me either. It was fun, I got to see all sorts of critters that I had never actually seen before - and was mere inches from a Tiger. Granted there was glass between us, but when he cracked one eye open to look at us from his nap, that was very cool.
Anyway, the trip, among other things, gave me some mental time. I mean there is something relaxing about having nothing to really worry about except where to eat a meal and which train to catch. I think I have my priorities in a better order now than I have had for quite some time. I find myself marking the occasion with a spat of cleaning. The house, my hard drive etc. Sometimes I wish I could do the same to my brain: get a bunch of little bins and nice clear labels and sort everything into managable spaces. Har. Anyway, one of the things I was thinking about was how mental time seems to be somewhat at a premium for the most part. I mean it’s hard when you share your space with someone 24-7, but the hardest part is when you allow your work to overtake your life. I would find myself worrying about stupid things that I would have to do that week at work at the stupidest times - so I’ve got myself a work notebook. Everything goes in there as soon as I think it should be done and then I don’t have to take that worrying-about-remembering-to-do-things home with me. That and I honestly care less about the job now. School has become my priority, and so one of the things I did today was review the things I need to complete my applications. Complicated? Possibly, but neccessary for my mental and possibly spiritual well-being. I’ve got some emails back so I am prepared for the next step. Yes. I’m excited, there’s a new chapter in sight.
Also had time to think about other things, but more about those, later. Maybe.
Yesterday I consider my first real day back at work - and I pulled a major klutz move by tripping over a box. I didn’t realise until later that I had actually cut myself when I fell, right on my left forearm where I usually lean my weight while I’m at the computer. I thought I had a hair or something on my arm and went to brush it away and it came away all red. The entire back of my forearm, right above the elbow is a lovely shade of lavender right now and puffy. Spectacular, eh? I always wow myself that way.
Hrm… stomach is wanting attention now I think.
listening to: Nitin Sawhney - Cold & Intimate
